From the desk of Deadpool

with help from the Pen of Professor X & the Paper of Hank McCoy

21 notes

Anonymous asked: If the opportunity presented itself, would you use geese as a weapon if you had no other choice?

That is just cruel and inhumane. What kind of animal do you take me for?

Filed under Anonymous

20 notes

Anonymous asked: Um... How would you cook a turkey with the power of love? Or do I even want to ask?

That one wasn’t me. It was Stark. And you definitely don’t want to know. 

Filed under Anonymous

15 notes

A few things

I don’t know what it is about the last little while, but there are an awful lot of people having a rough time of it. So how about you take a few seconds and help make a few people feel a little better?

Deadpoolvania is here to help. It’s what we do. Go here and here and say something nice. Make their day better. Do something positive.

I’d appreciate it.

-DP

3 notes

snark-maiden asked: I forgot to ask, can I pick the memo? I'm thinking the Valentines Day, 2013 if possible. If not, anything from S.H.I.E.L.D. HR is hilarious. Thanks again!

Sure, why not. 

If the other two have requests, now would be the time to make them.

Filed under snark-maiden

1,218 notes

Friendly Reminder to ALL S.H.I.E.L.D. Personnel:

director-of-shield:

Appropriate ways in which to cook Turkeys:

  • An oven
  • A slowcooker

Inappropriate ways in which to cook Turkeys:

  • A flamethrower
  • Gamma radiation
  • Napalm
  • A roman candle
  • A Pressure cooker
  • Any form of Nuclear Energy
  • "The Power of Love"
  • Stars
  • Stark’s repulsor blasts
  • Johnny Storm
  • Wade Wilson (especially not Wade Wilson)
  • LIST WILL BE UPDATED AS NEEDED. IF THINGS ARE NOT ADDED HERE, DO NOT TAKE THAT AS A PERSONAL CHALLENGE. I MEAN IT.

image

This is bullshit, Nick. That new guy was barely maimed. 

(Source: whyihavetrustissues, via shieldcafeteria)